So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
There's too many weed/neon/felt Sublime posters in this room and someone just put on a Hunter S. Thompson movie. Save me, now.
I think I sharted a yagerbomb.
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
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We ate our feelings. Then drank our feelings. I feel feminism delivered.
Braid them armpits, sister.
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
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theres a canoe in our lawn. we dont own a canoe.
it was the only safe place
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
I have to stop at Sheetz to put my bra back on before I meet you hold on
I woke up alone, naked in her bed staring at a lifesize poster of edward cullen,actually I'm lying I did have socks on
condom fairy costume came in handy...we were making out in my living room and he wanted it so i took a condom off the costume and we did it right there...with my tutu still on....
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
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