i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
You're so wise. You're like my sexual Grandmother Willow.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Im done having sex . he ruined it for me after he said " can we use my penis as a shovel ?"
Best feeling in the world is getting a random boob pic from a drunk chick at 3 am.
Whore are you.
Is that a Yoda insult or are you asking me where I am?
Yes.
I'm like going proud parent over you doing drugs, this is so wrong.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
like, is this a date?? I'm sitting on his couch drinking a juice box while he makes taquitos in sweat pants
he's a mother fucking interior design major!! we boned and fell asleep and now we're laying in bed discussing what color i should paint my room. i'm marrying him
Taking out my recycling and 90% of it is alcohol and cat food. I am judging myself.
He saw me naked after our first date and still asked for a second.. so I think we’re doing good
Family acid trip. They're welcoming me into the family.
What. The. Fuck.
Family acid trip.
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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