Texts From Last Night

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  (630): View more from Illinois

  Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way.

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  (630): Anderson Cooper interviews Obama. It's like CNN is teasing and broadcasting my dream 3 way. http://tfl.nu/v52c
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  (201): View more from New Jersey

  Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats.

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  (201): Sometimes, dog treats look like people treats. http://tfl.nu/rbah
  Replies (19) Good night (1118) Bad night (3099) Order T-Shirt
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  (262): View more from Wisconsin

  Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :)

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  (262): Hi, I just found this phone under my seat at a brewers game and seeing as you're entered in as 'fillllatio' I figured I'd ask you if you know the illiterate ass who owns this phone. Thanks :) http://tfl.nu/dwum
  Replies (36) Good night (10498) Bad night (769)
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  (856): View more from New Jersey

  Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.

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  (856): Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose. http://tfl.nu/pmmh
  Replies (11) Good night (3660) Bad night (1252) Order T-Shirt
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  (978): View more from Massachusetts

  Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him?

  (1-978): View more from Massachusetts

  Nah. I did too.

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  (978): Is it bad that I voted for Scott Brown because I want to fuck him? (1-978): Nah. I did too. http://tfl.nu/9ism
  Replies (67) Good night (2533) Bad night (3909) Order T-Shirt
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  (512): View more from Texas

  I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants

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  (512): I had to stop messing around with him for fear of laughing in his face. I swear it was a pinky finger in his pants http://tfl.nu/4e8k
  Replies (61) Good night (743) Bad night (8306) Order T-Shirt
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  (757): View more from Virginia

  He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds.

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  (757): He made me stop in the middle of giving him a blowjob so he could go get his glasses. because he "wanted to see". I need to stop dating nerds. http://tfl.nu/ihy8
  Replies (41) Good night (2796) Bad night (4619) Order T-Shirt
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  (+43): View more from

  my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe

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  (+43): my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe http://tfl.nu/lh72
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  (786): View more from Florida

  HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM.

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  (786): HE HAS A FUCKING TWIN. HE HAS A TWIN. I'M NOT DRUNK THERE IS TWO OF THEM. http://tfl.nu/yhvq
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  (270): View more from Kentucky

  Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best.

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  (270): Just found bacon bits in my pocket. Blackout buffet is the best. http://tfl.nu/nsnm
  Replies (4) Good night (2110) Bad night (861) Order T-Shirt
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  (903): View more from Texas

  Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis.

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  (903): Right, because I totally see myself driving all the way down there to fuck his world famous penis. http://tfl.nu/h9w8
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  (239): View more from Florida

  i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose.

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  (239): i think this is the gayest thing you've ever shown me. and i'm pretty sure you've sent me pictures of a dude sticking his dick in a horse's nose. http://tfl.nu/xxid
  Replies (6) Good night (773) Bad night (2457)
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  (205): View more from Alabama

  Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth.

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  (205): Rather than admit to myself he's hooking up with her right now, I choose to believe that he's not responding because he's masturbating to my picture, distraught over his poor choice, and trying to forget about the one that got away with a heavy dose of meth. http://tfl.nu/rtd2
  Replies (12) Good night (996) Bad night (2125)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends.

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  (850): There's a person in my phone named motor boat. I love making new friends. http://tfl.nu/r3vo
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  (208): View more from Idaho

  It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it

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  (208): It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it http://tfl.nu/8smb
  Replies (5) Good night (1164) Bad night (342) Order T-Shirt

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