I'll collect that couch/porn sloopy beedge tomorrow just FYI
Rosebud was a fucking sled. Gay.
Did you just see the Batmobile???
Is it wrong of me that I wish I could be a midget for a day so I can give head standing up?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
road dome is illegal, just asked in driving school.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
The low-flow toilet at my office cannot handle the intensity of this hangover.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
Just got cockblocked by my GF's wedding shower... That's a first. And I have to buy a gift.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But how do I turn off the feelings though?
Vodka.
Wrong. I really wanted to see the movie. And she was on top of me like she was riding a mechanical bull. Who am I to complain? I live to serve.
Is it weird that I'm looking up pubic hairstyles?
You shouldn't play strip poker when you're having a wet fart kind of day.
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
You sluts I'm so proud of you. You're both wearing underwear.
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