Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(813): View more from Florida

Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.

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(813): Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed. http://tfl.nu/pp8v

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(502): View more from Kentucky

You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.

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(502): You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear. http://tfl.nu/hwjh

Replies (17) Good night (5580) Bad night (624) Order T-Shirt
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(734): View more from Michigan

i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up.

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(734): i am exhausted. it's been years. we both know his dick is small. the jig is up. http://tfl.nu/9mj6

Replies (12) Good night (871) Bad night (3611) Order T-Shirt
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(785): View more from Kansas

your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us

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(785): your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us http://tfl.nu/mks6

Replies (18) Good night (3867) Bad night (806) Order T-Shirt
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(330): View more from Ohio

Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in.

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(330): Just so you know there's a random man downstairs knocking on a door with a dozen roses and a 30 pack of beer. Unattractive or not, I'm inviting him in. http://tfl.nu/l5u1

Replies (8) Good night (3551) Bad night (709)
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(720): View more from Colorado

I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony

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(720): I'm babysitting my fucking roommate he took out the screen and is trying to throw dishware in our fucking pool after he repelled off our balcony http://tfl.nu/iwpl

Replies (6) Good night (815) Bad night (1463) Order T-Shirt
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(907): View more from Alaska

marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it

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(907): marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it http://tfl.nu/qmr1

Replies (2) Good night (1224) Bad night (348) Order T-Shirt
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(508): View more from Massachusetts

This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies."

(401): View more from Rhode Island

I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are.

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(508): This hot topless Jamaican just ran down the st with me on his back and He was screaming "I be stealing yo white ladies." (401): I don't know if i should be jealous or worried... or question where you are. http://tfl.nu/26v4

Replies (17) Good night (4927) Bad night (696)
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(909): View more from California

I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.

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(909): I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic. http://tfl.nu/3gxu

Replies (2) Good night (589) Bad night (1161) Order T-Shirt
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(303): View more from Colorado

There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?

(1-303): View more from Colorado

Agreed.

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(303): There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree? (1-303): Agreed. http://tfl.nu/l0rd

Replies (7) Good night (1251) Bad night (738) Order T-Shirt
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(517): View more from Michigan

This baby is an asshole

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(517): This baby is an asshole http://tfl.nu/mlzh

Replies (11) Good night (1784) Bad night (706) Order T-Shirt
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(207): View more from Maine

He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug.

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(207): He's tweaking out . If he's on fucking bathsalts and eats my face like a chalupa pull the plug. I don't want to live with no fucking face. Pull. The. Plug. http://tfl.nu/cbeo

Replies (7) Good night (907) Bad night (974)
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(971): View more from Oregon

It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.

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(971): It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth. http://tfl.nu/pavc

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(319): View more from Iowa

Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint

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(319): Theres a point where you stop and say hey....as high as I am on LSD right now ...I`m just a man covered in paint http://tfl.nu/ay0t

Replies (1) Good night (567) Bad night (179) Order T-Shirt
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(502): View more from Kentucky

There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."

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(502): There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs." http://tfl.nu/6a8r

Replies (10) Good night (814) Bad night (184) Order T-Shirt

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