Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
In retrospect - making it rain salt all over our kitchen was not one of my best ideas.
I just found her phone in the quesadilla maker...
just had to re-breakup with her. it was like shooting a dead horse that was crying and talking.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
Nurse helped me count all my sexual partners and still gave me her phone number. She shall be #73.
I think your dick broke my retainer, I normally wouldnt care but my orthodontist died and I don't want my first appt to be blow job broken retainer with a new ortho.
Turn on the Discovery Channel
Lets fuck to motorcycle gang fighting
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Also, I would just like to reiterate my apologies for tearing up in the grocery store.
Doing the walk of shame at 1 AM. Stumbled across a rave. This night is epic.
When you wake up, I have a unicorn coloring book, crayons, mini cupcakes, and booze.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
i have a lot of questions about the picture quality/lighting/motion/gravity of the balls...
Eventually the conversation shifted (as it always does) to Sex toys.
Randomize