my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I ever expected to say, "Get your finger out of my ear or I will stop sucking your dick."
I can't believe you picked a finger in the ass over lunch with me.
If there was a card that said "I'm sorry for throwing up on your bathroom counter" I would send it to you.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is it customary to send a 'thank you card'to someone who gave you awesome oral as a gift at your housewarming party?
people need to understand when I say I don't want to drink anymore that doesn't mean tempt me with another bottle of Jose Cuervo.
My uterus just tried to get me to buy a tub of cookie dough
I may or may not have spiked my gatorade to get through a game of monopoly with these children.
I found my bra I wore on Friday night...he fucked the underwire out of it
hahahahaha
Rich men love me! I remind them of their trophy wife!!!
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