I'm drive I can fine osifer
i effing cant stand that stupid soul the new way to roll hamster commercial. everyone im with is laughing and now hate them all.
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Really?!? Does he think blocking me on FACEBOOK means that he doesn't have a kid with me?!
The landlord called, GOOD NEWS! Noise violation #2! Something about people singing and fighting with vodka bottles in the parking lot. Well done us.
Also, beer. Big fan.
The site I use to study flash cards keeps showing ads for truck companies hiring drivers. It's like the site is saying "hey, we all know there's no hope for you, just give up and Become a truck driver."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know what's awkward? Being with your girlfriend and seeing her ex-boyfriend that she left for you while you've got a Ron Burgundy level awkward boner.
maybe facebook could make a notification like "someone tagged a photo of that guy you used to bang and still think is really hot with his shirt off"
hurry there's a jack Daniels slip n slide and clothes are coming off faster than I can even comprehend oh thank god for autocorrect
Do you remember seeing anyone put a "my other penis is a vagina" bumper sticker on my car?
um care to explain the stolen chinchila under greg's bed..i'd be fine with it if it wasnt chewing up the stash
He’s definitely circumcised. There’s not enough room in those speedos for a foreskin with that fire hose he’s packing.
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