Balls are like the throw pillows of the penis
I'm gonna keep this simple. I threw up in your pillow case. Sorry.
I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
This whole foot fetish thing is getting out of control. He would rather hold my feet than me after we fuck.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some guy just walked by in the street and for 5 seconds yelled "IMM SOOOO HORNYYYYYY!!!!"
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
I walked from the hotel to the club with a pint of tequila in my boot. Poured some in a homeless woman's mouth when she asked for change. I've hit rock bottom.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
the manly guy you want to date so badly? he's at the club. as a drag queen. wearing higher heels than you own. think about that.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
.As long as you're some how patriotic with your sexual escapades, I can support it.
I got custody of our girlfriend in the breakup.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I don’t know how you celebrated 4/20 but I set a Payless trash can on fire
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