Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
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i spent 45 minuets spilling my heart out to him telling him i was in love with this other guy sorry. when i was done he asked me to give him a blow job. i did. i have commitment problems
She told me to stuff her like a turkey. She actually yelled happy thanksgiving.
Totally using formspring as an incognito way of making sure that girl from last night wasn't jailbait.
She introduced herself as 'Ann the sober one.' Took me to a coat check and a lost and found. Then offered coffee and breakfast sandwiches. Turns out she's been paying her half of the electric bill running post-party operations.
Today I met the neighbor that shares my bedroom wall. When I pointed out my unit, he said, "Oh, that's you? Oh... that's you." I didn't think much of it until I was in bed tonight and I heard him clear his throat. He's. Heard. Everything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
All she was asking was for you to describe your coat so she could get it, but you kept yelling at her so the security threw you out.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
I just drove by a stop sign that had a used maxi pad stuck to it WHAT THE FUCK
I'm sorry your Amazon says buttplugs now
Should I rub the neighbors amazon package in the dog shit they left on the front steps?
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