you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
I threw up red last night... I wanted to pinch myself because it wasn't green.
I didn't know how to tell her I was too busy getting stoned and making a baked potato to meet up and finish our group project.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
sick fucks of a feather flock together
When the shrooms kicked in we both simultaneously realized we were not the right puzzle piece for the dubstep puzzle.
We made eye contact and were like we are not welcome here, the ravers are onto us and we need to get the fuck out before we get shuffled upon
It's really sad that I'm trying to calculate in my head the type of place to have dinner that's worth anal
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We need to step up our tailgating...they're here drinking out of a prosthetic leg
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
I wanna die. I can't recall the last time I was happy that doesn't involve your hand touching my butt.
We had a company shotgunning beers contest in the parking lot today, and I won. God bless America!
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Unless my dick prospects improve this year’s Halloween costume will include panties with “DTF” written on them and a push up bra
Randomize