I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I was in holding with a guy that got a DUI on a hover round. He was so nice. We're hanging out tonight.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
He kept waking up periodically throughtout the night to bit my ear and pass back out.
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Is 'too horny to study' a good enough medical excuse to not take a final?
Glow parties are what I live for
Your priorities in life astound me
I will be going to walgreens soon.. nothing says trainwreck like pickin up a scrip for xanax at 2am drunk..
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
do you remember showing me a picture of your husbands penis last night?
yea! the mushroom one. i would only show you.
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Get off me. I'm done. I want a cookie.
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
It would be weird sobbing cry sex.
I puked on her cat, I think I should at least buy her breakfast
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
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