Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
he told me not to treat him like a child and then started peeing off the trampoline
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're having a serious conversation and I just responded to something he said with an emoticon. I am so baked.
That gas station is used for only two things, picking up moonshine and getting murdered. Only two outcomes.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
After he finished he proceeded to check my boobs for breast cancer.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Alex I've come up with a new medical condition. dick depression. it's a real thing and I have it
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I'm sitting here drinking whisky and listening to The Wiggles, I don't need a social life
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