did you get my message about your dog?
no... is he ok?
no, i didn't see him when i was being chased out of your house. check your drive way :( sry
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
we did it on the carpet and she just yells out "OH. MY PSORIASIS".
Why I am the classiest girl you know: just mixed drinks for everyone on the baby changing station at the movie theater.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
there is a strobe light in my taxi. in what way is this safe.
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She was bending and I said "finally, about time". Wrong, she was tying her shoe. No blowjobs for me.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize