My liver just broke up with me...
Too many people are naked here for this to be normal.
You were peeing on yourself thinking it was the sprinkler in your yard
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying to figure out which chair my head was under last night
Woke up in her bed this morning with a half used condom stuck to the side of my face
How can a condom be "half used"?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
Heard you had a bad day. I have vodka, chocolate and my dick here ready to put a smile back on your face.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh I was gonna ask you the same thing...? It's official ask anyone to see your husbands dick day.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
I may or may not have hooked up with the cop who arrested me.. Or I can cross hooking up with a stripper in a cop outfit off my bucket list.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
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