it went kinda like vodka, childhood memories, screaming/cursing, fist fight, tears, broken shit, passing out. in that order. tis the season.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
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Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
Omfg amy I'm not kidding you I think a blow job is what landed me in the hospital
I just remembered that last night I ate nachos off of someone else's table with a stranger
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
So here's my pathetic thought of the day: what does it smell like to be sober?
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Please hurry. I'm the only one here who's not an attorney with a trophy wife.
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
You have a full penis tattoo of a cobra fighting a mongoose, don't you?
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