I think it's safe to say that I made out with the entire msu campus this weekend
he looked upset that i wasn't completely shaven. i reminded him he had begged. and beggars can't be choosers.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
today is my dealer's birthday. i dont know whether to give him the day off or call him saying happy birthday ill take a quarter please
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i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
don't worry about the poodle she's always like that. she's like 14 years old and ate a bag of weed when she was a puppy.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
her night didn't end so well, both of her boyfriends got arrested... together.
He says he quit drinking. I'd like to have a moment of silence for losing the best drunken hookup ever. We will build a memorial to his awesome cock.
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All three roommates are gay and in women's studies. Ive already been informed that all penetration is rape. This is not the college experience I signed up for.
I like using largw condoms because they are more comfortable but also I feel bad because it's like false advertisement
Finals drinking + forgeting you had to take your ambien because you work at 6am mid paper= drunk logic which then entails going on a "detox" run. Puking your guts put in the field house bushes while some random guy says to you "its okay. We're marching on."
I'm attracted to him because he looks like the kind of guy who would lick my asshole without me having to ask.
Speeding home on my break at work because I forgot to grab my Percocets that I have because getting through work sober's too hard
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
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