Alone. In an inflatable pool. Drinking vodka and raspberry lemonade. I don't need approval as much as I need to know you love me still.
Youre on making sure I dont black out around fat chicks duty
Okay good. I don't want another mom thinking I got their daughter pregnant.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
By 11 pm the pants were off and there was no turning back. But on the bright side, you promised me your CDs when you died, you even signed a napkin saying so.
You tired to make us "vodka tacos". Which was just you dipping pitas in vodka.
Any good?
Well. FUCK YA. But that's beside the point
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
she doesn't even know what year it is. She just stumbles around life with a bottle of rum
Please tell me I did not drink enough whiskey to think that having sex with my boyfriend while his best friend was on the floor next to us was a good idea.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
he told me he wanted me to go see his cat. apparently i was more interested in playing with his cat then having sex.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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