Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
my penis was classy and tasteful, i don't know what her problem was.
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so Mike and I made a deal. we'd do anal if he would help me pick out carpet tomorrow.
What...you let him do that?
It wasnt that bad. the two minutes it took is nothing compared to the 10 hr day I have planned for him tomorrow
Hey, could you leave the door unlocked? Keys seem hard right now.
I just ran from Santa Claus in Kroger
The Firefighter Games are going to be in Tampa the same weekend I am. I think God is answering my vagina's prayers.
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
I don't hate him I just hate being present to see him consume 80 dollars worth of alcohol and then try to tip people with left over money on a Walmart gift card
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Just had hot animal sex with the guy who had been sending me 10 second selfie snapchats for the past month
Everything was cool till you started pissing while standing at the bar
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
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