she read insantiy as in-nast-tit-ty and asked what the hell does that mean...
These old people don't even realize they're giving me weed money for shoveling snow.
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
I forgot to tell you. Your neighbor was walking his tiny dog and saw me crawl out of my jeep drunk vomiting and holding onto my bumper. He just said: morning! all friendly.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
How does one hint at their mentee that they used to casually fuck his brother
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
VOOOODKA VOOODKA WE PLEDGE OUR LOVE TO THEEEE VODKAAAA VODKAAAA SAVIOR OF LIBERTYYYY
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
Last night I crashed my housemates tinderdate, smoked his weed and then left. He felt too awkward to say no.#Empowerment
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
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