is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
mom just found 19 empty wine bottles in my closet. i hate spring cleaning
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Tell Taylor to rock on. Tell her she is so beautiful that the sun shines down on her face and shows her beauty. Tell her to live on, like Martin Luther King. He'll never die. He's living his dreams.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
I woke up tied to my bed while she was in the corner staring at me while eating cereal. Interesting night!
Pounding your chest saying "me Tarzan" is not flirting or even talking
the new numbers in my phone would beg to differ
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's definitively the wine. Every time I can drink and work I feel like I win at the game of life.
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
She totals her lexus and all she wants is to have crazy wild sex.
Randomize