Theyre still fighting about whether its called america or the united states.
you win again, gameday.
Had sex five times today because there was nothing else to do. I had no idea snow days could get even better than when we were kids
We didn't even make it to the door before they came out saying we weren't allowed in because of last time..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
Whip out the absinthe and the taquitos, this motherfucker just passed the bar.
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm pretty sure my roommate is moving out because her cat likes me better
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Come to my place after work and we can discuss our finances over a coors delight and a fire ball shot
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize