They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
It's an "im going to have to shit with the lights off" type of morning
I was seriously concerned she had died since she wasn't moving at all, but then I asked here where she was last night and her response was to hip thrust the air.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were sending me snapchats from a bathtub with your beer helmet on and your boobs out.
They should just send me home - I'm literally doing nothing but watching porn and listening to pandora.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
I jumped out of a moving car going sixty into my driveway because I had to shit so bad. It is not a good day today.
The funny part was that the cop pulled us over cause the park was closed, not because I had just come up from giving the guy a blowjob when the cop drove by.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Bring me your tired, your weary, your buffalo chicken dip
Hey I just woke up in the back of a pickup truck parked at taco bell... Can u come get me?
Is it weird that my mother is taking body shots off my gf after meeting once?
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize