If last night was a website it would be called poordecisions.com OR uncircumcisedspanishweiner.org
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
i want to cheat with him just to show his girlfriend what a terrible person he is.
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
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I would not wish his dick upon my worst enemy
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
By the way, we're gonna have to get a new rug for the livingroom i kinda started ours on fire...
he sent me a pic of his dick and balls out with sunglasses over them like a face. i was at dinner.
do you still have it? i kinda want to see.
i ate a whole tub of butter with my hands last night. don't tell me about rock bottom
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
Well watching will be involved...it'll just most likely be of me licking your penis instead of me trying to understand how Hans Solo goes up against the Galactic Empire...
And then he said, "let's have sex and I'll send you home with enchiladas."
He skipped an important family function with his dying father to fuck me. Terrible human, amazing fuck buddy.
Relationship goals: we both wore red underwear tonight. Except he won’t know because my bra been off but it’s the thought that counts I guess.
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