Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
everytime i listen to a chris brown song and like it i feel like i bad person
My Higher Power is John Stamos
ever seen your mom drunk enough to lick your face? i have
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Mass Text: Free blowjob to first person to bring me a nacho cheese chalupa.
Pretty sure I just became the first person ever to use the word "boner" in a wedding card...
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
I did not have sex with him because he had a puppy…finding out he had a husky pup waiting back at home was just an unexpected plus
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
The comfort of this onesie is keeping me single
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
Today is a good day to get high. It's easy to blame the glazed-over look in my eye on my new contacts
Randomize