i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
on the list of things id be doing when i was almost 30, waiting for a girl to finish shitting the bed wasn't on there.
I have your camera. You have 35 naked pictures of me. you're welcome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
life is sad when you just turned 21 and youre doing late night rogaine runs...
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
Puking out the window is really hard when you're the one driving.
If you fucking touch my phone and text people, drunk or sober, ever again, i will shove a swizle stick up your pee hole.
Randomize