OMG I just tried to text you something dirty but accidentally texted the obama campaign
I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
I can make a handprint turkey for extra credit in history. I feel like the word college should be in quotes on the school letterhead.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I snorted a few ambien and woke up here. A lady banged on our door, waking us up, demanding our towels.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
You're dick is like the main character. It needs its own picture.
If I died tonight, I'd be content knowing you were the last person to see my boobs.
Please tell your sister I apologize about saying her baby may have beef curtains. That was inappropriate.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
Quick question: now that you've broken up, should I also delete the nudes your boyfriend sent me while you were together??
Randomize