well that one time I was being a total idiot trying to see how much I could drink. turns out 22 shots is too much. surprise surprise! ambulance party!
lol earlier she was acting like a normal gf... and then BANG! shes touching herself again...
you got in your car and made the sounds of a NASCAR, then called me on your phone and I was your pit crew. then you apparently you won the race, and THAT'S when you tried to backflip off the top of your car.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
I swear my vagina formed calluses just to deal with how big he is
You have plans tonight?
Stress crying into a bottle of long island ice tea mix...other than that nope
he's a ginger AND was born with 2 holes in his penis. sleeping with a rare species & I LOVE THE THRILL
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
He was telling me how he was trying to grow up. And then 2 minutes later, he told me he was tripping on lsd for the first time.
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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