Just seen on a tshirt : "fake titties taste funny"
The only thing I can remember you saying is "I won't cut pizza like this when I'm older."
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
The straight man in me wants to hit on her. But the gay man in me wants to compliment her on her awesome outfit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
We are hot boxing the gondola
I hate everything.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You can't just beat off while driving someone else's car. Thats a rule
Thats your rule and this car is nice
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
my brother has friends over and I can hear one of them screaming from the basement "BREATHE. FILL YOUR LUNGS. LIVE YOUR LIFE." and it sounds like he's doing some motivational speaking down there but that's actually just how he encourages ppl to take bong hits
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
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