How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I wish i could just live off of margaritas and good sex.
That works. I won't care. I'll be a mermaid. Mermaids don't give a fuck.
Especially drunk mermaids.
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
thanks for piggy backing me around for the rest of the night when I got too drunk to stand.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
He ate me out for my sailor moon manga and I gave him a blowjob for his Devilman manga. Pretty sweet deal imo
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