i'm in hospital, i have an exam in 3 hours and the man in the cubicle next to me is doing a noisy poo. this has to get better.
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
The boys are giving me the exam answers and I don't even have to expose my body..yayy engineering!
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Not cool at all. Last night I organized my condoms by expiration date. I need to get laid.
im kinda looking forward to winter break. ive been away from home for so long i think i can trick my vagina into thinking that these arent the same people ive been hooking up with since high school...
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
he keeps trying to sext me and all I can do is respond with descriptions of what im eating.
She just passive-aggressively stripped in the kitchen while humming the theme to Doug.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
Yeah I blacked out in a wiener costume.... I think I'm ready to come home now.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
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