Hey, kurt drew a penis on you and wrote my innotals. I had nothing to do a/ that.
i have a food baby... i think its a boy...
How long does it take to cook a corndog over a candle?
Did i tell you my idea for my life plan? Not the one that involves stripping.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last thing I remember clearly was, "ok, but if we're are gonna get drunk before class, there's no half-doing this"
NoShamevember. You game?
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
Just got a ride from a stranger while walking a mile home as it hailed with no coat. He asked me if I smoked, then said he just made some potent cookies and I could have one.
The cookie was what I originally wanted to tell you. Always say yes to drugs from strangers
Great news. Our sex broke my otter box
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know how Dave is alive, I feel like he's been drinking since I met him.
Because my vagina is Ellis Island. All foreign penises must be presented for inspection and competency. God bless America.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
So vagazzling was a success
I can't wait to see you again. It will be like when we first started dating- but with less clothes.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
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