If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Fat chicks shouldn't bartend
if I hooked up with that creppy kkid in bio does that count as doing charity work during the holidays?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
"Whiskey Cheerios" was a terribly great idea.
Chasing tequila with honey. Ill let you know how it turns out.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
He has been feeding me cheesecake and candy for breakfast. Naked. For three days. How am I ever going to leave????
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Was so high at one point last night that while showering I was worried that using too much hot water would slow down our Internet.
They left me at home... I'm a liability
My roommate just angrily told the cat he should have knocked, but that's not lockdown madness. They're always like that.
I smell like beef jerky
That's among the sexiest things you've ever said to me.
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