Dude, my boy c***** and I hooked up with Asian sisters last night in the same room
Then I put on blue by Eiffel 65 and security showed up and yelled at us for being too loud. Also, they stopped fucking because no one can fuck to eiffel 65
im sorry i hit your dog last night,,,i didnt even see it
I dont have a dog?
WTF
I'm going to save the lime from my McDonald's salad to use in my Corona later tonight.
the three of them together have enough kids to fill a barney live audience.
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As we walked into his room, he said welcome to the hurt locker. I should have left, but I love that movie.
while cleaning my room, i've found many wonderful things. one of these is the card you gave me for my eighteenth birthday. it's a christmas card that says "i want to stick it in your sponger"
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
You said that "grilled cheese was much to complex" and started to throw the buttered bread at the wall while eating all the cheese.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
People will call it the Wrath of the Froyo. We'll be immortalized.
I have loved her ever since she went down on my first wife
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
He was laying on a lawn chair, fell off onto his stomach and asked, "where'd the stars go?" That high.
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