Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
I just made out with a guy for $7.
i feel like i'm waiting in line to date brett michaels
I think I just sat on my labia. Can I borrow some scotch tape?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had sex three times last night.. but now im just wet from him crying on my stomach about how much he misses his ex.. awesome
i had to get the starbucks manager to open the bathroom door for me...you passed out on the floor, the things i do for you
You crossed every boundary on the boundary spectrum last night. You're like the illegal immigrant of drunk actions. No more holiday drinking for you.
We had to leave after he was in the middle of the street yelling "Balls of Steeeeeeeeel!!"
it's my favorite when the couple downstairs are having sex so loud that i feel like I'm part of a threesome
second-hand sex is fun, isn't it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm going to text my booty call and tell him nevermind, that I got the job finished by myself. That will teach him to text back faster.
This lesson is brought you by a psychology class.
So the " I'm gay but curious" thing worked. You owe me 50 bucks.
Because you failed to stop the wedding, now I have to be a homewrecker. My eternal damnation is on your head I hope you're proud.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
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