you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
Girl in front of me has spent the class alternating between playing farmville and the tiffany's website looking at engagement rings. Every once in a while she holds her hand up to the screen.
She doesn't deserve the breathe the same air that we do.
She just bought a cow and we've moved on to looking at wedding dresses.
I just found out my favorite drunk show, Repo Men, is just reenactments. I can't express through words my disappointment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh good. ive just found out that i went downstairs at 6 am still blacked out and had a 30 minute conversation with my mom about the different ways to feed our dog
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
just lying in bed drinking beer with a straw waiting for motivation. why?
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
She made me be the little spoon then she pretended to be a jet pack for an hour straight
When you accidentally text the wrong guy for a dick pic and your surprised you get one In return. He just got on my "to do" list
I just want to drink bourbon and have sex and then eat like, a Christmas cookie.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
I don't know what kind of bucket list you have, but having sex with a tree isn't on mine...
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