Regardless thnx for trying to help out, I realize we are dealing w/ very stupid girls here
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
my Econ professor just passed around his phone for us to take a pic of ourselves so he could learn our names. I am currently looking him up on my sex offenders app.
Whatever, she only has 293 friends, she cant afford to be defriending me..
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Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
I figured out why I insisted on leaving my sweater on the ground outside. I smelled it and I'm 97% sure I peed on it last night
Tell me you didn't really piss in the hookah.
With me living this close to Mexico now, Tequila is just a geographical choice at this point if nothing else.
So apparently after I spilled candle wax down the front of my pants, I went to the store, bought condoms, and passed them out to everyone at the bar.
I thought they were lying to me about the condoms, until I found the receipt in my pocket.
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He let me finish eating my sandwich while I sat his face. I think I'm in love with this little eager beaver.
I just sneaky put a tampon in on the bus ninja-style.
......how on earth do you do that?
NINJAAAA
For dinner, I'm having saltines, canned whipped cream, and beer. Are we sure I'm responsible enough for home ownership?
He said he couldn't fuck me cause I kinda looked like my brother
I mean I did fuck her boyfriend, the least I could do is post happy birthday on her Facebook wall.
we cut you off when you started chasing with your slim fast shake
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