his Mom's staying with him so he asked if I'd go over and fuck in his shed. he said "it's a really nice shed"
Guy next to me is looking up how to press his own ecstasy pills. I'm going to befriend him and see where this goes
could you please explain to me why my jumper cables are on my bedroom floor?
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
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Do you think blood ever gets sick of carrying all these drugs around?
Like, there are so many different things we make it do, and it just wants to settle down and be a one-drug fluid?
Stop reading WebMD high.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
Aw don't be embarrassed. It was all good fun! We've all been there. You can't come to vegas and NOT get a little alcohol poisoning. That's like going to church and not praying.
Every time you visit for the weekend I end up having to bleach my entire house after.
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He fell backwards into a full bathtub but didn't spill a single drop of the beer in his hand. What a pro.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
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