You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
bras are like tupperware for tits, keeps em fresh.
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I have glitter on my penis. Do you know anything about this?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude it was like an art museum there were boobs everywhere
You're the only person i know who can laugh and talk while puking
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
He tried to finger me at Disneyland! He tried to taint the happiest place on earth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think I'm just gonna be a cat and wear slutty black clothes with some eyeliner on my face and pretend my ears got stolen by a drunk guy
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
the night was just a blur of sex and pie
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
My eye was non-stop itchy for like an hour... I thought burying my face in your ass caught up with me
Randomize