Can Purell be used as lube?
Im like a co-bf. he pays for her birthday and christmas, but i get all the action.
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
I moved my bed to the living room so when a girl walks in she has to decide right away if shes in or out
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just walk up to him nice, spread your legs like smooth peanut butter on toast and scream "LOOK AT MY BEAVER! LOOK AT IT!!"
she put on her moms wedding dress and is chugging purple jolly rancher vodka, happy cyber monday
Woke her up in the middle of the night with the smell from a fart. So proud of my colon.
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Congratulations, you have turned my vagina into a garden hose.
Also, I wish we had magnetic nipple rings and our boobs stuck together.
The vodka gummy bears are so strong. If I die of alcohol poisoning, please tell my dad it was single malt scotch.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
R.I.P my virginity. TOD 12:37pm
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
Randomize