you really are a gigantic fucking slut.
sidenote: just remembered sarcasm does not translate through text
it's probably a bad thing that i wasn't even offended, huh?
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
Judging by the hole in the wall by the door, the mis-matched shoes by the door, and the door hanging off one hinge... i'd say he's on the loose.
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so im sitting outside the gym eating a 20 piece nugget stoned out of my mind, convincing myself this is more productive because im so close to the treadmills.
I was wondering if I fell or perhaps got hit by a truck, then I remembered, it's cause I did a splits contest at the bar
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
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WHO ARE THESE GUYS WHY AN ORGRY ON A MONDAY LMAO
These flip flops mean I'm casual, but I'm here to fuck.
There's nothing like when u really click with a stripper
Gave his drunk ass water, & he poured it on my shirt while saying "WET T-SHIRT CONTEST!" When reminded of it today he replied with, "at least you came in first place"
i had to win in rock paper scissors, get called a fat whore, and make two dudes get in a fight so we could call next game on the table and you make zero cups. thanks asshole.
Someone should walk up to them and say, "We're sorry, you're too hot to be out here with the other humans."
Randomize