Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Big sunglasses are the new paper bag
ya. and they're way easier to confince girls to wear during sex
At least you didnt end up topless in a Tina Turner wig singing cabaret tunes
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you convinced me to pee myself because I was wearing dark jeans.
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
I have a breathe right strip stuck to my forehead, several inexplicable bruises and I think someone tried to paint my nails with glue, but I still have my Santa hat. I'm gonna call this one a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm tired of being known as the Great Giver Goddess of the Almighty Pity Bone.
I have a sixth sense for large penises and lack of morals
Girl, he's like catnip for my pussy.
Even though I'm gonna be a felon I'm having fun for time being.
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Randomize