nut hugger
fuck the hobbit
what about unicorns?
fuck those pointy horses
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
I guess I puked all over my hand too and I just looked at my roommate and said, "fix this."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
DELETE THAT VIDEO OF ME MAKING OUT WITH THAT RUG NOW
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I used my mad pharmacist skills to turn ordinary birth control into morning after. I think my professors would be proud.
Can I come over and use your shower? My roommate got drunk last night and took my bathroom door off its hinges
So drinking that old rum that I found in the ceiling of my dorm was prob not my best idea. But good news: my puke was so colorful b/c of all the skittles i ate
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