from all the glitter we used it actually looked like a disco stick
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
we just ordered 30 dollars worth of french fries...whats wrong with us?
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
i dont trust my judgment anymore so im only going to fuck guys who can donate blood at the red cross. they have standards.
you kept saying "i will not *breathe* regret this *breathe* in the morning *breathe* i just gotta remember *breathe* to BREATHE"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The international association of gay square dance clubs had a booth set up in the lobby of my hotel.
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
The fact that it was "anything but a cup" now explains the cowboy boots and fishbowl aftermath at the apartment.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
It's has to do with my genitals. Don't ask.
You spent an hour sitting naked in your neighbor's Jeep Wrangler yelling in a terrible British accent about how you were "on a safari". Then you passed out on your lawn.
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