# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I want you to know that wearing office supplies as jewelry results in waking up with the wrong roommate. Also, strip clubs and vodka don't mix.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
with all this snow coming, and no school, I figure why not try every possible liquor snowcone.
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
We need to do something soon. I need like 4,000 beers and a cigarette.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Sex and bbq. He sure knows how to make a girl feel special
All I want is dick and wine.
So your telling me I can lick your ass but you CAN'T spend my money
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