Being alone has allowed me to flourish into a complete weirdo
oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I plan on offering nudes to any guy that wants to give me notes from the past five weeks of class
guy at the corner shop gets out a bottle of tequilla and a pack of malboro light whenever he sees me through the door. makes me feel loved and cared for
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she slipped a pinky in my ass. Not sure if I came because I liked it or if I was terrified by it.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Professor just informed us that she can't come to class today because her daughter broke her glasses and she can not see where she is going. Am I still drunk from this weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
Have you picked out a bathroom stall in which to fuck? Since you've got all this free time before her plane lands...
There are horrible decisions in life and then there are tequila flavored moonshine decisions
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Happy 20th birthday! I hope you like anxiety and having your debit card declined at McDonald's!
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