There's a girl here with sideburns. I gave her your number, you can thank me later.
god please explain to me why there's blood underneath my fingernails AND toenails?!?!
Dude To be completely honest I don't think you want me to.
I wasn't on board with that statement until "home made dinosaurs"
i had to take my roommates dildo out of her suitcase so I could use it
the suitcase or the dildo?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wow, haven't had to deal with the 'stoned at the dinner table' scenario in a while
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
I feel uncockblockable...banged her in the bathroom with my iv still in
while we were dancing I voluntarily took my bra off and hung it around his neck as a necklace. 2011 lets go
That makes the second boyfriend of hers that I've fucked. I'm gonna start keeping an eye on every guy she even speaks to. Girl is my sexual rabbit's foot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
they told me if I wanted to live here I had to get an ass tattoo and then they all mooned me simultaneously. ass tattoos as far as the eye could see.
just reached the point where my breast implants paid from themselves in free drinks.
I just put Gatorade in my wine, cause electrolytes, you know.
You still owe me a blowjob for knowing more about hurricanes than you.
I'm not in bed, I'm driving and puking at the same time.... first for everything
I guess you know it was a good night when you find your ripped underwear in your pocket, and a nerf bullet falls out of your pant leg 😂😂
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