the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
It was the first time I had seen his penis when it wasnt hard. It just looked so vulnerable and a little bit depressed.
I told him I'd have sex with him for fried cheese. Does that make me a hooker or just fat?
You don't forget tits like those, even if you are vegas drunk.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want what they have, but in the meantime I have a whole bottle of rum to which I'm quite devoted
I want to throw pennies on her stage, or just ripping up a dollor bill and throw them one at a time.
He took off his priest costume and proceeded to dryhump the teletubby.
Just threw up in front of the Boy Scouts on my base. Welcome to the Navy kids.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
WHAT IS HAPPENING
A FLOCK OF DICKS IS MIGRATING TOWARDS US.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
Facebook is for cat videos and having better lives than people from high school, period.
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
My GF, FWB and Side piece are all booty calling me. I’m a victim of my sexual success
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