Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
i think the date started going downhill when i mentioned how many therapists i have
It's alarming how good I'm getting at being productive at work on Thursday after Johnny Walker Wednesdays.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
Highlight of the week: I had sex with a B movie star wearing an eye patch.
Do you know anyone with a stuffed cougar? I want one for a self portrait to hang in my house. A bobcat or lynx might work too.
But think about it. I could put her gold medal around my penis
The trick will be getting hammered before we get to the first bar
Challenge accepted
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last night was so embarrassing. I got like almost blackout drunk and threw up in my hand and then blamed it on someone else.
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Aint no party like a Broke College Girls Eating Stuffed Crust Pizza party
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
I deserve a medal for being woke up at 6am on my day off by your mother asking where your brother is
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize