Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
May or may not have just drunkenly opened my christmas presents. Greatly disappointed. Might break up sooner.
ive come to the point where weve hung out more times sober than drunk. i think im growing up. fuck.
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you figure out which one you wanna sleep with, & I'll sleep with the other one. problem solved
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
Duuuude. Everything is so brilliant right now. This frosting is freaking orgasmic.
It's vanilla, man. Accept no substitutes. There are so many t's in that word.
It's not even like I care. He was cute 30lbs ago and before he fucked that Michael Jackson look alike.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I don't care what you say, the fact that he's a drag queen with the same shoe size as me is reason enough to date him
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
Your life is a soap opera of great sex, cats, and booze.
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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