She looks like Robin Williams dressed as a frog.
Tall, dark & handsome can suck my short, pale & awkward dick.
New swimming pool is best sex toy ever. We are pioneering the doggie-style paddle.
Confirm for me that it's be a bad idea to sleep with the 50 year old that's currently hitting on me?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its official. 'Jingle Bell Rock' gives me a boner. Thank you Lindsay Lohan & Rachel McAdams.
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Last night we got home from the bar and saw a fox outside and we lured it in the house with a piece of cheese. Just wanted to party with some potentially dangerous wildlife I guess.
She's in the bathroom. Literally just told me she could make a guy cum using just her words. Not bad for Sunday brunch.
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
No, next time he offers you a ride home, ask him about Batman. The result will always be road head.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
her nickname was handjob. I knew what i was getting into.
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